I Hate Goodbyes

Assalamualaikum and Greetings!

This is the first post I am writing after I have completed my undergraduate life. How time flies, three years has passed. I have been saving this post in 'drafts' since yesterday...so I think this is the best time to publish it.

First, I would like to thank my friends for always being there for me, for always giving me advice on things, for helping me when I needed them the most, for those crazy and stupid things we always did, thank you all. I love all of you. A special thanks to the McWankers United (me, along, ag and khye shern), for having me and for being more than a friend for me, each and every one of you. All the best for all of us and may our plan may be realised one day.

Being the host is not easy as it seems - 'cos I'm a Penangite. Yes, my house is just near USM, and I chose to be the last one to leave...and to consider the fact that I'm there to witness my friends, one by one to leave USM, is heart-breaking. But I know, we must move on, onwards and upward, as Ag put in his farewell poem.

As I am writing this post in my nearly empty room, I am hit with the sudden realisation that things will never be the same again, even if we were to meet again someday here. The feeling is like, when I go to my friends' rooms and realise that they won't come back to their rooms anymore - brings tears to my eyes. It is time, to move on to the next chapter in our lives. So, before leaving the place for good, I made it a point to go to each of my friends' rooms and take pictures (I asked them to not lock the room before they leave) - to preserve the memories that we have in each and every one of the place.Ag and Bob's room is quite disturbing since their room has lots of junk stuff. It is as if they're returning and will be gone in a short while only as it is messy as always. hahaha

I learnt a lot from my three years in USM. The learning experience extends beyond classroom activities tutorials and assignments - I made memories with friends, and the level of priceless-ness (if there is such a word) is more than the feeling of finding free gems in the bushes in Clash of Clans. Tonnes of memories were carved in my heart, in this place.

 I learned about life itself, about finding my true self, about love, meeting people from all walks of life with their different worldviews. I failed here also (in certain aspects), but in here also I find the strength to pick myself up and achieve more successes than failures. These are all priceless for me... I will remember the lessons learned to the next phase in my life, thank you. I will remember each and every one of you, forever in my heart.

We knew back then that this day will come someday. And now that we find ourselves in it, we were hit with the sudden realisation that we are not ready for this day. That each of us are all caught up with our own business; to settle work-related stuff, minor subject paper, getting a place to stay for work - a far cry from our dreams of doing things right before leaving, the things we had planned before we part ways. We were never ready to leave. We always thought that there will be tomorrow, there will be the trip to Qb to makan at Habanero's (yes, we call it Habanero's 'cos at first we thought that it was a person's name).
 The fact that we were caught unprepared for this, made parting ways even more difficult and sadder. Tears filled up our eyes each time we meet, knowing that it will be long before we can ever meet again.

I don't know why, but I find that the song 'The Funeral' by The Band of Horses fits this and I associate this song with the feeling that I'm having right now and the song is on repeat as I'm penning this post.

I hope that we will always keep in touch and may the bond that we built will forever stay strong with us. May the memories stay with us as we revisit them one day. 

"Goodbyes are not forever, 
Goodbyes are not the end, 
They simply mean I'll miss you
Until we meet again ! "

Until then sweet farewell my friends... 

Ends.